Saturday, April 21, 2007

Nappy Headed Dough

In a bid to bust yet another cap into the now rotting carcass of Don Imus, and to boost her run at the White House in 2008, Hillary Clinton (ridin' on twenties!) rolled into New Brunswick, NJ to commiserate with, fawn over, and leech blood from the coach and players of the Rutger's Women's Basketball Team. To the team's eternal credit, not one player showed for the conference, citing inclement weather, the need to study, and a general fatigue with the whole sordid episode.

I'm not going to delve into the Imus absurdity at any further length, because . . . well because Dennis Dale has already done it better than you, I, or anybody else is likely to.

Anyway, back at Rutgers, Hillary was - hoes or no hoes - determined to squeeze from this gathering whatever political juice she could:

Clinton addressed about 700 students and faculty on campus later in the day, praising the players and naming them one-by-one while criticizing "bigotry" against women. She never named Imus directly and made a point of saying her criticism wasn't intended to curtail free speech.

She urged the crowd to take a "Rutgers pledge," to say, "Enough is enough, when women or minorities or the powerless are marginalized or degraded."

Later, the former first lady traveled to Manhattan to address Rev. Al Sharpton's National Action Network Convention, where she ravaged President George W. Bush, particularly over Iraq. (article in full)

Meanwhile, down at the FLA crib of rap producer and performing phenom "Timbaland" (whoever the hell that is), a March 31st fundraiser brought in $800,000 for the Senator's Presidential campaign. Yes, that figure is correct. Both Hillary and her 'Dawg' Bill were in attendance, basking in the love (and money) so generously lavished upon them. As you may know, her husband was our nation's first African-American President.

However, the life of a Dee Cee Hustla is not without its weird twists and internal contradictions, as P. Willie can himself attest. It seems that some of "Timbaland's" compositions may not entirely adhere to the principles Senator Clinton outlined in the "Rutger's Pledge," and what is to be done about that?

Here are lyrics from Timbaland's "Come and Get Me":

"Nigga Your Time Is Up, I Aint Come To Kid You
I Knew You Niggas Was Dumb, But How Dumb Is You . . .
I'm A Ride Or Die Nigga, I Be Tearing [expletive] Up
We Aint Like Them Other Fools, Who Don't Compare To Us
All The Hoes Love A Nigga, They be Backing It Up
But Me I Love Money I Be Stacking It Up . . .
I'm Rich I Can Pay To Have You Six Feet Deep (Nigga)"

And from his track "Kill Yourself":

" . . . most of u rap niggas is hoes to me,
wherever u from
the question I ask
is do u think I give a [expletive] . . .
u mad at me? cuz im getting rich,
well put the pistol to ur head and empty the clip, pop nigga!"

And the uplifting "Considerate Brotha":

". . . Hoes coming up short? Hoes finna get cursed out!
. . . Slam the mask out of these hoes and they say, 'What is that, velvet?'
And they betta meet they quota, betta yet betta meet they deadline . . . I'm a pimp all around
A pimp of the town -- we pimpin 'em up, HOES DOWN." (article in full)

Will Hillary "Do the Right Thing" and wash her hands of the misogynistically-tainted 800 "G's"? (I realize I'm dating myself here, and I suppose the issue of my ethnicity is no longer in question, but I don't really know what the slang-of-the-day is for one thousand dollars. "Chump Change" perhaps?)

According to Ms. Clinton, Don Imus' comments "showed a disregard for basic decency and were disrespectful and degrading to African Americans and women everywhere."

How do you suppose she reconciles her concern for the rights and dignity of African American women with the revenues generated by the lyrics above, revenues in which she now shares?

Well, like Fat Joe and Lil' Wayne, I suppose she finds some solace in the notion that, "I make it rain on dem hoes . . . " (Perhaps you've seen the video.)

How will she answer questions regarding the evident contradiction in her own position on disrespectful and degrading images of African Americans and women everywhere? What the hell makes you think she'll ever have to?

We're living in a sawdust circus, we're bit players in a crumbling farce, we're witnessing the latter days. She won't have to answer to anything, and nobody cares anyway.

But what I want to know is:

How is it that the pit of American politics seems to have an ever-receding bottom?

Does the pit of American politics actually have a bottom?

How long before Hillary and Barack square off in some gangstaesque smack-down or face-off, or whatever you'd call it, reminiscent of those stirring scenes of imbecility in Eight Mile Road?

Why is it that our politicians in particular are so keen to excise this word "hoe" from the American vocabulary?

How long before we see a horse serving with distinction in the U.S. Senate, assuming we haven't already?


Dennis Dale said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dennis Dale said...

Timbaland is a hugely successful hip hop producer. His namesake is, yes, a popular brand of shoe.

Anonymous said...

I seem to recall that, once upon a time, this site was in English.
What happened?

Black Sea said...

Dear Grumpy,

As I have noted in a previous post, the British "think tank" (boy, could we have some fun with that term) Demos, has already made clear to you tea-sipping snobs that: "the language is no longer the preserve of the English, who are just one of many shareholders in a global asset".

Stop trying to monopolize this global asset, and start sharing with your fellow shareholders!

As you may know, we are to be instructed in, and are to instruct others in, Hinglish, Chinglish, and Spanglish, with further variations to follow, include the sort found in this post.

I've no doubt that Ms. Clinton will take up this banner just as soon as she occupies the White Horse, sorry. House, and will perhaps employ your old chum T. Blair as special consultant.

Anonymous said...

I would be fine with the 'sharing' idea if you Yanks could be trusted to take care of our joint linguistic heritage. As it is, it seems that you are doing to English in the US what your government is doing for democracy in Iraq. In the process you create something I would call Manglish, or Garblish.
Having said that of course, I have to admit that 'Our Tony' and his minions are doing for our home-grown version of the language what our naval personnel did for heroism in Iran recently. Surrendering it. The result in the UK is Yoblish.
So far as the redoubtable Mrs Clinton and 'Our Redeemer' Saint Tony are concerned, I would paraphrase the old Vaudeville joke: Take our Tony. Please.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to take up your space, but I have just looked at the Fat Wayne/Little Joe video (with the sound off, of course). Now I have a question; Since the principals in the video demonstrate that they are totally devoid of taste in every other respect, how come they have such great taste in hoes?

Black Sea said...


I take your point about the "English in America, Democracy in Iraq" argument, though I object to being referred to as a "Yank" for reasons having less to do with the British-American linguisitic debate than with my archaic and no doubt pathological regional loyalties.

Anyway, "Yank" must be preferable to your now infamous "Half-educated Rednecked Bigot," soon re-coined on another website into the less cumbersome acryonm "Herb." Who says we "Yanks" have no sense of humor?

But I digress. As to the point that America is doing to democracy in Iraq what it has been doing to the English language for decades (centuries?), let me suggest an alternate analogy.

Democracy in Iraq is not so much equivalent to American English, which though perhaps debased, draws on a long and glorious hisotry, as it is a political equivalent to Esperanto, a wholly inorganic construct which no one seems to practice, though everyone admits it's "a good idea."

Evidently, we human beings are more creatures of custom and culture than of bold horizons and bright new ideas. How sad for us.

Oh, and I think you owe it to yourself to view the Fat Joe video clip with the sound on. Otherwise, you deprive yourself of its full charm. I actually like the song (don't ask me why) or at least, it has tenaciously lodged itself in my brain, perthaps due to the stunning visual impact of the hoes employed as scenery.

What's more, I think the video and lyrics together offer a pretty accurate portrait of the current American political scene:

"Yeah, I'm in this business of terror
Got a handful of stacks
Better buy an umbrella
I make it rain . . . "

It's more articlulate than anything ever to come out of our president's mouth.

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